First of all, thank you to Alun Salt (@41un on Twitter) for the phrase “dying of embarrassment” which he used to conclude a blog post sharing his own experiences and thoughts based on some of the things I said in my previous post. It’s a rather hard-hitting but spot-on phrase that just because the likes of cervical smear tests might be a tiny bit embarrassing, is it really worth putting off?
I also wanted to pick up on the thread about feeling guilty for worrying about something that is PRE-cancerous, when I know that thousands of people actually have cancer already and are in far worse a state than I am. I do feel guilty that I’m rabbiting on about it, but like I’ve said before, being someone who has in the past dilly-dallied with making smear test appointments I realise now just how important it is and will always be quick off the mark in the future.
Thinking a little more over the last 24 hours about my anxieties another concern is ‘when did my cells actually become pre-cancerous?’. My smear test with abnormal results was six months ago, so in theory they could have become pre-cancerous anytime in the three years previous (I assume), since all previous check-ups have been fine. Also at the back of my mind is the fact that at some point, those people who are currently being treated for cervical cancer would have at some point been in my exact same position undergoing a routine procedure.
So I’ve decided to give myself a break and not feel bad for feeling a tiny bit anxious.